Ron Zacapa Centenario 23 Year Guatemalan Rum
What’s a pirate’s favorite letter?? Aaaaaaaarrrrrrr…. Most rums make me feel like a pirate, but this 2-decade old cane juice makes me like I’ve just pillaged, plundered and despoiled many virgins. Aaaaaaarrrrrr.
What we have here is some top-notch Guatemalan hooch. Like the Zaya, which I previously claimed to be “the best rum ever made”, it’s got that classic Guatemalan sweetness to it. It’s thick legged, just like you like your women– and she wraps those suckers around you, digs in the spurs and rides you to the mercado like the jackass you are, where you pick up a healthy sack full of cloves, a healthy shot of booze and some cinnnamon for the ride back home. Once home, she strokes you to sleep… and while you’re sleeping she hits you over the head with a fry pan and steals your wallet while giving you the best hand-job you ever had while unconscious. Sound like fun? It is if you’re a Pirate! Aaaaarrrrrr!
Anyway, I digress. The oak’s nearly gone here. Or should I say, it’s so infused with the cane that you can’t distinguish one from the other. What you have in the end is a totally unique-tasting thick-legged hooch like nothing you’ve ever had before. It doesn’t have that artificial-tasting sweetness like Pyrat, just a mellowed caramel body with spice around the edges. It feels like a wine when you drink it. In fact, there’s almost no harshness to the alcohol– though it is 40 proof, it drinks like a wine or even a liqueur.
100 points, plus 2 for the hand job, and 20 more if she brings back my wallet.
(5 votes, average: 5.00 out of 5)
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The second paragraph gave me one hell of a Tijuana flashback…
Zacapa also makes a 15 year that is about 90% as good as the 23, and 60% as expensive
Wow, that’s a great tip. I had no idea. Never seen it. Shit, there goes my weekend.
Thought we had found you a bottle of the 15 for your birthday at gwine.com, a place somewhere on that other coast. Had it ordered and everything, but then we got notice that they actually didn’t have it in stock and that supposedly it is no longer being distributed in the states. Damn!
Anybody up for a trip to Guatemala?
I have to come back around to this one and just reiterate what I said 2 years ago in my original post:
GodDAMN this stuff is good. I just bumped into 2 bottles of it at my local candy store and I had to buy ‘em both. One down, one to go. The problem I seem to be having with it is that I drink WAY too much of it. I mean, WAAAAY too much. It really does go down like wine, so I find myself drinking a godawful lot of it in a sitting. It’s only when you stand up afterwards that you realize something is… amiss.
I’m watching a porno called “Pirates” right now — a spoof on Pirates of the Caribbean — drinking the Zacapa 23 while Evan Stone sticks it to 2 bad “actresses” playing 19th century whores. All in all, it’s a good combo, if only I could fire up a big cigar in my living room. The wife’ll allow the porn and the rum on a weeknight, but I’m not gonna push my luck with the cigar.